Inbox: Eastbound

[paperbutterflies]

Lan Sizhui

missives | encounters

Comments

[downswing]

Sizhui. You were young, on my hip.

He has led armies whole before.

[paperbutterflies]

In a world where he understood weakness and strength both, no? And leading an army needs a goal.

[downswing]

His intentions are unquestioned.

[paperbutterflies]

Unlike his safety.

[downswing]

I ask much.

[paperbutterflies]

Hanguang-jun, how can you ever ask much of me, when you have given me everything?

[downswing]

Will debt always live between us?

[paperbutterflies]

[ A confused moment because, wait, isn't that how things are supposed to be? Owing the previous generation for your life, and everything in it?? Infinitely? ]

I do not think of it as debt, Hanguang-jun, only that whatever you may ask, direct, or tell me to do, I will do my best to do.

[downswing]

Once, I stood equal to you in compliance.

[paperbutterflies]

And now you are far dearer to me than any such time.

[downswing]

Obedience is overly valued.

[paperbutterflies]

But is it not useful while one is still learning, to avoid making mistakes that others will have to fix?

[downswing]

Are you not yet past learning?

[paperbutterflies]

Am I overly obedient?

... and also, are you past learning?

[downswing]

You are better than I was.

[paperbutterflies]

Hanguang-jun, how can that be? You were not that much older than I am now when you and senior Wei had to deal with the Xuanwu of slaughter, I have neither the skill nor the strength to match that.

Though I am doing my best to have more of both day by day! But I still could not compare.

[ Sizhui is fully aware how much better his dad is, thank you very much. ]

[downswing]

You heed your heart more.

[paperbutterflies]

Oh! That, I learned from you, too.

[downswing]

Better.

[paperbutterflies]

Thank you, Hanguang-jun.

[ Not sure why this, and given the ways that Hanguang-jun has followed his heart as long as Sizhui has memories of him, not entirely convinced, but he also doesn't want to argue... and also, Hanguang-jun spoke of himself at Sizhui's age, which is different from what Sizhui knows. ]

Now I just need to make sure my skills are good enough for where my heart wants me to go.

[downswing]

With Wen Qionglin?

[paperbutterflies]

[ Is this what

Dad, please. ]

To uphold what my sect, the sect that I belong to, has taught me and be righteous and protect those who cannot defend themselves. If he would join me sometimes, I would be glad for the company, but his path is his and mine is mine.

[downswing]

Do not turn back on blood.



( But also... don't favour them more than... your adoptive father... )

[paperbutterflies]

I will not.

But even the closest ties of blood have people separate, if only to meet again - and, Hanguang-jun, he is not here now, why are you thinking of him?

[downswing]

His sister. Your aunt.